Back in 1998, when we sought a publisher for my first book, Selling Above the Crowd: 365 Strategies for Sales Excellence, I could have papered the walls of my house with publisher’s rejection slips. There were dozens of them. No one would touch the book for one primary reason: I had never published a book before! Thus, no one wanted to publish me because no one had ever published me! My wife Rhonda and I believed that this book would help a lot of people, so we never gave up. Finally, we decided to self-publish it. We financed the layout, copyrighting, cover design, and printing out of our own pockets. Without a publisher, we were unable to get the books into bookstores, but we were able to sell it through Amazon.com, at workshops, and through our own www.learntolead.com website. To our immense relief, the book took off through word of mouth and we sold thousands of copies. With this success behind us, we decided that I should write a book for managers. As a result, the idea for, No Nonsense Leadership, was born.

We thought that surely things would be different when trying to find a publisher this time around. After all, we had published a book that had sold thousands of copies! We couldn’t have been more wrong! The rejection slips poured in again! Since we hadn’t been published by a “recognized” publisher, no one took us seriously yet again! Undeterred, we also self-published No Nonsense Leadership and sold thousands of copies once again! Before we could submit a book proposal for my third book to a publisher, I received an email from Matt Holt, at Wiley Publishing (the world’s largest business book publisher), who had seen an excerpt from No Nonsense Leadership in a popular business magazine. I’ll never forget what his email said: “I just read your article in Executive Excellence Magazine and really liked it. Would you like to discuss book ideas?” My first reaction was, “Where were you two hundred rejection slips ago?” Matt and I hit it off and my third book was launched in 2003, Up Your Business: Seven Steps to Fix, Build or Stretch Your Organization. It proved so successful that I wrote an updated and expanded version in 2007. It’s been translated into several languages and has sold well around the world.

The lesson? Never give up! Have faith in God, believe in yourself and invest in your dreams! Keep finding ways to improve your abilities and add value to others, and you’ll outlast most of your competition. Stay in the game long enough to get noticed by the people that can help you and to attract their help and support. I’m now writing my eleventh book overall, and my ninth book with Wiley, How to Lead by THE BOOK: Proverbs, Parables & Principles to Tackle Your Toughest Business Challenges. Whenever someone asks what my favorite book is, I always tell them it’s the one I’m currently working on. But without a doubt, that first book that nobody wanted, Selling Above the Crowd, still holds a very special place in my heart. This is especially true as, twelve years after it’s initial publication,  I continue to get encouraging letters from salespeople all over the world who have changed their careers and their lives by applying its principles.

When they designed How to Run Your Business by THE BOOK they hit a home run, so we want to keep some of the concepts the same with the new book, without making it too similar. For instance, we will retain THE BOOK with the same all caps distinctive look. In fact, since I will continue to write books in the “by THE BOOK” series, branding those two words will be essential. I should have some designs to look at within a couple of weeks. Now, let’s get on with today’s lesson.

In Matthew 10, Jesus commissions his disciples to go out in pairs and begin to preach, heal the sick, cast out demons, and raise the dead in His name. He gave them His authority to execute all these things, which brings me to the leadership lesson I want to convey in this posting. Jesus didn’t send his team out to do these things until He had first done all of these and more in the prior nine chapters. In other words, Jesus didn’t tell His team what to do before He had showed them how to do it!

Unfortunately, this is where many managers today miss the mark. They are addicted to “should be’s”. “You should be doing this or that”, etc. However, it doesn’t take much leadership to sit in a chair and bark out what people should do. Effective leaders get in the trenches, roll up their sleeves, and show people what good performance looks like. They lead with deeds, not just with words.  This is because followers would rather see a sermon than hear one.  This being said, how much time do you and your managers spend actually showing people what to do? For instance, consider the following:

1. Do you tell them they should be closing more deals, or do you show them how to close them, in front of the customer with the employee at your side?

2. Do you criticize them for not setting enough appointments, or do you take the phone and show them how to do it?

3. Do you admonish them to get more referrals, or do you demonstrate the proper way to ask for a referral? This list of questions could go on for a while, but you get the point.

Recommit to following the example set by Jesus. Don’t just give pep talks and empower your team to do their job until you’ve first shown them how it should be done.

There are numerous potential momentum-breakers in the day-to-day life of any organization. One I will focus on today is gossip. This seemingly harmless drivel can cause confusion, resentment, create factions, and deplete the energies of those spewing it, listening to it, and contemplating it. Take a look at what THE BOOK has to say about this sort of reckless speech:

But shun profane and idle babblings, for they will increase to more ungodliness. And their message will spread like cancer. 2 Timothy 2:16.

Notice here that the gossip itself isn’t even the worse element of the act. It’s the certainty that the “idle babblings” will increase to even more ungodliness; bitterness, resentment, envy, and outright lies for starters.

But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned. Matthew 12:36-37.

“Idle words” can be categorized as useless, unnecessary, or careless.

Sometimes people gossip about a person they envy. Another reason someone gossips is to make themselves look better at the expense of someone else. This sort of self-centered attitude is dangerous, as is pointed out in James 3:16: For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. Do you grasp the potential for problems when you see a phrase like, “every evil thing.” “Every” means: all, excluding none. That doesn’t bode well for team unity, focus, or results.

Many people who do not gossip personally, enjoy listening to it! Listening to gossip makes you an enabler, and renders you little better than the gossip himself! Some Christians have gotten sneaky about how to gossip. They say things like, Word on the street is that John is having an affair with Mary. Please pray for them. What a load of nonsense! If you’re truly concerned about the situation, go talk to John or Mary, not about them!

If someone comes to you with gossip, you can turn it aside by saying something like this:

1. “Wow! Instead of talking about John and Mary, don’ t you think it might be best to go and speak directly do them?” That normally brings the conversation to a quick halt!

or

2. “I appreciate your confidence in telling me this. But I’ve decided to try harder to focus on the things about my job that I can control. I appreciate your understanding.” Without judging the perpetrator, you kindly communicate to them that you want no part of their childishness.

Remember this also: people who gossip to you will also gossip about you!

Stay on the high road. If what you are going to say doesn’t add value, remain silent. And when someone comes to you to spew their idle or profane babblings, don’t enable them with an audience.

Character: The combination of qualities or features that distinguishes one person, group, or thing from another. A distinguishing feature or attribute, as of an individual, group, or category.

Based on this description, it’s easiest to think of character as one’s moral and ethical code. It is a combination of inside traits that determine outward behavior. Now look at the definition of integrity:

Integrity: Steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code.

When you combine character and integrity here’ s what you get: character is one’s moral and ethical code, and integrity means that one lives according to that code. Thus, someone who lives with integrity, lives according to their moral values. That being said, you must first determine the moral values–the code–of that person in order to ascertain whether or not living with integrity is a good or bad thing. For example: If someone has a moral code that says they should inflict injury upon a person of another religion or race and they do so they are, by definition, living with integrity. Unsettling, isn’t it?

On the other hand, if an individual has a strong moral and ethical code but compromises what is right when it serves popular opinion, or in order to achieve personal gain, they are not living with integrity. Despite the quality of their character, their failure to live by their code creates significant behavioral problems.

This is why endeavoring to determine one’s character in an interview is a fairly accurate, but not a foolproof way, of predicting one’s future behavior. One will normally live according to their character code–with integrity–but there may be times when they abandon that code for the sake of expediency. This makes it the responsibility of the interviewer to determine when those instances may occur. Here are two clues:

1. Administer an in-depth personality profile prior to hiring. Our own assessment evaluates 24 traits that are significant indicators of future performance.

2. Examine their life thus far with thoughtful interview questions and deep follow up to their answers.  What have they overcome and accomplished? Have they demonstrated persistence, mental toughness, unselfishness, and strength of character?

The Bible tells that a tree is known by the quality of its fruit, and thus we must examine the fruit of one’s life in order to determine the quality of their character. This principle can be quite helpful when determining the potential value an aspiring applicant may bring to your organization. It may also help you detect those who are inclined to inflict a negative value upon your organization due to a weak character code, or a tendency to compromise it when things get tough. Since you cannot change one’s character once you hire him or her, it’s essential to hire those who already possess a foundation of moral and ethical soundness.

1. If someone needs food or clothing, don’t loan them the money, give it to them. The Bible lists food and clothing as a basic need. Thus, you don’t just give them the money if they need their cable turned back on, or want to upgrade their cell phone! Proverbs 19:17: He who has pity on the poor lends to the Lord. And He will pay back what he has given.

2. Never co-sign a loan. Co-signing makes both parties a slave to the bank. Read Proverbs 6:1-5 and Proverbs 22:7.

3. If someone is having money problems, giving them more money will not solve their long-term issues if they are not applying biblical principles to their finances. The chances are far greater that they need instruction that will help them over the course of a life time, not a short-term infusion of cash that will soon be gone, leaving them in want again. Instead, you should counsel them to apply the wisdom in Malachi 3:10-11 and Proverbs 3:9-10. Normally, those with financial pressures don’t need more money. They need counsel from God’s word.

4. If someone is complaining that nothing is going right in their marriage or family, you could inquire if they honored their parents while growing up of if they got married with their parent’s full blessing. If not, the best advice you could give them is to be reconciled to their parents, because God tells us to “honor our parents that it may be well with thee.” Ephesians 6:3

As you can see, loving your neighbor doesn’t always mean doing what is asked. You must use wisdom to discern the real need. As you counsel another, it’s important that they feel your concern and love for them, and not condemnation or judgment. Otherwise, they will most likely reject your advice. The Apostle Paul instructed Titus to, “speak evil of no man” and instead to show meekness unto all men with humility, remembering that we have also been at times foolish, disobedient, and deceived. Titus 3:2-5.

Helping someone without using the Bible as a guideline can cause many problems:

1. The person becomes entitled.

2. The person begins to depend more upon you than on God.

3. The person never gets a chance to grow spiritually and apply principles that will create long-term benefit in their lives. Thus, they continue to repeat the same errors and get caught up in a vicious cycle that imprisons them and robs them of their joy and future.

2. Once you are in a leadership position there are more demands on your time and talents, not less. This can actually restrict, rather than broaden, your freedom.

3. You must be more intentional with what you say, how you say it, and in controlling your emotions publicly. This is because you are on display and everything you say or do will be magnified many times over.

4. Since leaders have increased authority, power, and discretion, more is expected in terms of performance. The additional clout and resources you’re given when you become a leader strip away the excuses for failing to deliver results.

As you can see, leadership is a lot more about responsibilities than it is “rights”. Once you become a leader, the bar is raised and you are expected to step up, not let up!

When people read the Bible and learn how Christ came to replace the Old Testament’s legalism with love and grace, they often falsely believe that graduating from the Old Testament to the New Testament broadens one’s boundaries to behave sinfully. After all, Christ obviated the ritualistic rules and regulations that restricted God’s earlier people, so this added grace can be used as a license to sin and carry on recklessly, right? Wrong. Just as moving from a subordinate to leadership position raises the bar for your behavior, so does becoming a believer of Christ. Many Christians are surprised to discover that Christ’s behavioral commands were stricter than those in the Old Testament. Here are three examples.

1. Old standard: Exodus 20:13: Thou shall not murder. Jesus’ standard: You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder’, and whoever murders will be in danger of judgment. But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment.” Matthew 5:21.

2. Old standard: Thou shall not commit adultery. Jesus’ standard: You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Matthew 5:27-28.

3. Old standard: Thou shall love they neighbor as yourself. Jesus’ standard: A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. John 13:34

In How to Lead by THE BOOK, I will offer strategies for leading by personal example rather than by personal convenience; to commit oneself to a cause, rather than selfishly commit a cause to oneself. I’ll make the case for leaders to raise their own bar for behaviors and results. But Luke 12:48 certainly says it much better than I will and in far fewer words: To whom much is given, much is required.

1. You spend more time with “stuff” than you do with people.

2. You look at people as an expense rather than an asset.

3. You don’t easily trust others, and they in turn are skeptical of your own actions and motives.

4. You don’t feel a love for the people you work with or serve as customers.

5. You routinely judge, keep score, and condemn others rather than look for the good and build them up.

If you don’t consider yourself as a “people person”, and use that as an excuse to justify any of these five attitudes towards people, you’re hiding from the truth. The fact is that you’ll never become a people person until you value people! And you cannot truly value and love people until you fully love God. Thus, if you have relationship problems, they are symptomatic of a bigger issue: your relationship with God isn’t what it should be!

Watch carefully the sequence of Jesus’ words as found in Matthew 22:37-39 as He replied to the question, “What is the greatest commandment?”: Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second commandment is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’”

Jesus knew that the second commandment wasn’t going to happen until his hearers embraced the first one!

In, How to Run Your Business by THE BOOK I included an entire chapter on developing people skills. But the first step to developing people skills is to love and care for people! In, How to Lead by THE BOOK I’ll include strategies for developing a greater love for God, and for people. Here’s a hint: While you won’t have to think less of yourself to pull this off, you will need to think of yourself less.

There are even occasions when your accomplishments will actually stiffen your opposition and strengthen the coalitions against you. In fact, this is exactly what happened to Jesus after He raised Lazarus from the dead. Lazarus had been dead for four days. When Jesus called him from his tomb and he walked out of it alive and well, it was clearly a miracle. But John 11 relates how, while many believed in Him after this miracle, the religious leaders most threatened by Jesus’ success and popularity circled the wagons and began to plot how to kill Him. If it happened to Jesus, it can happen to you.

What can you do when others plot or rally against you because of your success? I’ll cover strategies for this in, How to Lead by THE BOOK. While I don’t have the space to delve too deeply into the topic here, let me present the “short answer”. You can’t do much about it,  so don’t! You cannot control the whims or plots of others. What you can control is your own behavior, attitude, and character choices. Continue to do what is right and let God handle the rest. Claim Psalms 62:6 as your defense: He only is my rock and salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved.

“It’s great that you know these things. How often do you do them?”

That’s when they break off eye contact and begin making excuses!

As I write, How to Lead by THE BOOK: Proverbs, Parables & Principles to Tackle Your Toughest Business Challenges, there is no question in my mind that many readers will beat themselves up a bit as they read strategies they’ve heard before but haven’t applied. The pain of their neglect results in performance plateaus and mediocre outcomes. And that’s a good thing, because frustration and disgust can be terrific motivators! When you realize that you know better, the next step is to do better! In fact, knowing is nothing! Life rewards action! Life doesn’t reward your wisdom, experience, credentials, or knowledge. If you want to get greater results in your business or life, you’ve got to get up off your knowledge and do something!

Biblical principles espousing the importance of doing what you know are many. Jesus said in John 13:17: If you know these things blessed are you if you do them.

In John 14:21 He declared, He that knows my commandments and does them, it is he who loves me. Isn’t that an interesting comment?  Many Christians think that loving God is enough and that their works don’t really matter. But Jesus teaches that you can’t choose between loving and actions, you must do both! He makes clear that to really love Him you must do what He says! In other words, knowing is never enough! There is only power as you do!

One of your most persistent challenges as a leader will be to close the gap between knowing and doing. You normally don’t fail to reach your potential because you lack knowledge. Rather, you fall short because you fail to do more of what you already know. In, How to Lead by THE BOOK, I’ll offer a series of steps to help you do more of what you know, and to do so with a consistency and degree of excellence that significantly impacts your personal and corporate growth.

Answer: “Acknowledging that it must be changed.”

The seventy challenges I tackle in, How to Lead by THE BOOK will require that the reader changes something in order to improve results: his thinking, leadership style, perception, strategy, and the like. But before anyone can change anything, they must first admit there is a problem. And therein lies the biggest challenge of all, because the natural tendency is to minimize our faults, trivialize the dangers of living with the status quo, and continue to dwell in denial. We forget that if nothing changes, then nothing changes.

This was one of the most frustrating challenges Jesus had in dealing with the religious “experts” of his day, the Pharisees. In John 9, after healing a man blind from birth, the Pharisees refused to acknowledge that God worked through Jesus, labeling Him instead as a sinner. They could not deny the miracle, but they steadfastly denied Christ’s role in performing it. They insisted that they saw, even though they remained blind to truth. This is why Jesus declared to them in verse 41:

If you were blind, you would have no sin; but now you say, “We see.’ Therefore your sin remains.

In other words, if they honestly didn’t know in their hearts that God was working through Christ, they could plead ignorance. But because they knew in their hearts that this was true, but refused to acknowledge it, their guilt and shame remained.

The simple truth is this: you cannot change what you don’t acknowledge. While you may intuitively know the areas you must change within yourself or your organization, until you confess the problem and face these issues, you cannot fix them.

Living in denial is dangerous. Denial stifles your potential, kills your dreams, and can eventually even kill you. Just as a cancer victim can deny their lump is abnormal until it is too late, you can sanitize your faults and shortcomings right up until the point when the bottom falls out of your life or business.

Paradoxically, as long as you live in denial yet insist that you “see”, you will remain blind. But truly “seeing” means that you face reality about what is wrong with your life and act upon it with as much speed as you possibly can.